How Patriarchy and Rape Culture Hurt Men

Hey! Today, I’m sharing a post from SaferCampus.Org

To read the full post click here. Below a few highlights.

The patriarchal “ideal” of male toughness and invulnerability creates the following problems for men:

  1. Men are often expected to endure hazardous conditions, with the attitude that any expression of fear is a sign of weakness. This means that men are likely to find themselves in dangerous jobs, or in risky physical conflicts ranging from fist fights to actual combat.
  2. Men are often afraid to admit emotional weakness, making them less likely to seek help for depression and other mental health issues, or to be accurately diagnosed, which increases their suffering with these conditions. Perhaps as a result, men are more likely to commit suicide than women.
  3. ………

8.   ……..

The patriarchal “ideal” of male emotionlessness and the expectation that men should not show affection creates the following problems for men:

  1. Many men never feel loved or fully appreciated by their fathers. This can cause a wide variety of negative ripple effects in their lives.

4.   Many men never experience the depth of intimate friendship that is accessible to most women.

The belief that men and women appear in “ideal” forms creates the following problems for men:

  1. In a racist, homophobic, capitalist, imperialist, ableist, fat phobic, trans phobic culture, the implicit identity of any “ideal” or “normal” man or woman will be white, straight, wealthy, colonizing, able-bodied, thin, and cis. All other identities will be used in the service of this “ideal.” In other words, men who don’t fit into this identity won’t be considered men. They will be considered threats to women and children, or to the stability of masculinity…

4.   Most men do not fit neatly into the image of manhood laid out for them. This  leads to insecurity, anxiety, self-loathing, and other psychological stresses.

5.   Fear of being perceived as “unmasculine” leads many men to abandon or hide interests and hobbies that could be deeply fulfilling for them.

The powerlessness of women in various elements of life creates the following problems for men:

2.    Many men face far more financial and family-related stress than they would in a culture that made room for pregnancy and recovery from childbirth, breastfeeding, and active parenting.

4.    The resentment some women inevitably feel at being treated unfairly leads to a wider sense of resentment by many women toward men. This hostility strains relationships of all kinds.

9.    The flip side of the the expectation that “boys will be boys” which allows men to engage in narcissistic, violent, crude or inconsiderate behavior with fewer consequences, is the propagation of a variety of stereotypes that are deeply degrading to men. Images of men as animals, uncontrollable brutes, and selfish clods abound, and they do men no favors.

The gendering of the work required to maintain family and home (emotional work, nurturing, parenthood, housework, etc.) as “feminine” creates the following problems for men:

4.    Since work designated as “women’s work” is devalued in a patriarchal society, high-status women (usually white, wealthy, cis, straight, thin, able-bodied women) will often find ways to escape this work by exploiting low-status men and women. These poorly paid (or unpaid) workers experience great economic, relational, and other stresses due to their low status and lack of access to resources.

Men’s violence against women creates the following problems for men:

  1. One in three of the women a given man cares about will experience a sexual assault in their lifetime, and one in four will experience intimate partner violence. This includes daughters, partners, mothers, sisters, friends, and any of the many women a man loves deeply.

6.   Men are often viewed with suspicion by women who don’t know them well, reducing their chances of meeting new romantic partners if they are heterosexual and causing them discomfort in various situations (e.g. fathers on the playground with their children may feel unwelcome, men walking down the street at night might find themselves criss-crossing to ensure that oncoming women don’t feel afraid, etc.)

The minimization of so-called “women’s issues” creates the following problems for men:

4.   So long as those in power can frame an issue as a “women’s issue,” most men will ignore that issue, even if in reality it affects their lives just as deeply as it affects the lives of women.

The fact that so many people are afraid of changing gender roles creates the following problems for men:

3.   Many men who do wish to experience more freedom in their gender expression often find themselves facing resistance and ridicule from romantic partners, friends, and family. These men may find themselves ostracized and lonely.

To read the full post click here.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s